115 Funny Rodent Puns And Jokes That Are Hilarious!

Looking for the funniest rodent puns and jokes? This is the best list that’s perfect everyone. They’ll have you squeaking and squealing!

Are you looking for the funniest rat puns, hamster puns, and rodent jokes? Aww, rats! Just kidding. This is the best list you’ll find!

These jokes and puns are perfect for every animal lover. They’re perfect for everyone else too! So without further adieu, get ready to squeal!

Note: This post may contain affiliate links, which means if you buy from my link I might make a small commission. This does not affect the price you pay. See the full affiliate disclosure here.

Table of Contents

Rodent Puns And Jokes

These rat jokes puns are under-rat-ed!

What do you call a rodent that steals your dessert? Pie-rat.
What’s the difference between an actor and a burnt rodent? One’s Chris Pratt, the other’s a crisp rat.
What’s the rodent arrested for? Rat-keteering
What do you call a rodent with a machine gun? A ratatatatata.
A rodent has dreams of winning American Idol. His father says “Gopher it son”.
A rodent infestation….is quite a mice thing to wish on your enemies.
What kind of insurance do rats need? Road Dent Insurance!
What do you call a rodent high on life? A Hamsterdam.
What do you call a rodent that refuses to be used to scientific purposes? A lab brat.
My dad bought a pet rodent from an oceanic country. It was papa’s New Guinea.
57 years after his death, we discovered that this one famous author made a path for small rodents who really want to throw themselves off a cliff….He called it the Earnest Lemming-Way.
What is the device which is used to cool the lower jaws of South American rodents? A chinchilla chin chiller.
What’s the most monstrous rodent of all? Chinzilla.
I met a rodent who didn’t eat to tell me his name. He preferred to remain anonymous.
What do you call a rodent drama set in Florida? Miami Mice.
I have a large rodent trained to make the best coffee ever…it’s my very own capybarista.
Where do rodent warriors go when they die? To Bole-hole-a.
What’s a tree rodent’s favorite tea? Squirrel Grey.
Did you hear about the Turkish rodent who go t a job in politics? He was Burak rat.
Which of the rodents are great at math? The pirates.
What do you call a rat with wooden leg? A pie-rat!
What’s that rodent doing, taking it easy by the pool, it kind of seems to be relaxing its jaw? It is a cute chinchilla.
What do you call a rat with a cold? Rat-achoo-ouille!
What will a rat never tell you? A squeak-ret!
Where do rats go to get drinks? A squeak-easy!
What do rats eat on their birthday? Cake and mice cream!
What do you call a spiritual rat? A buddha-Pest!
How do rats celebrate when they move into a new house? With a mouse warming party.
Why was the rat afraid of the river? Because of the catfish!
Where do rats go to replace their tails? A re-tail store!
What is a rat’s favorite game? Hide and squeak!
race car driver holds rodent races, names first rodent Danica RAT-Rick! Fans say it was a RAT-tastrophe!
Why is being a vegetarian like being a prickly rodent…because for pork, ou pine.
They’ve been experimenting with adding rodent DNA to pet medication. After all, what cat wouldn’t want to take his pills if they tasted really mice?
A small rodent lives in an apartment next to my computer keyboard. It’s his mouse pad.
Who’s the most technologically advanced rodent? Elon Muskrat.
My mom is terrified of rodents. The other day she saw a mouse and immediately pulled a knife on it. “Mom!!! You’re going to get us kicked out of Disney world.”
Why can’t rodents be successful criminals? Cause someone always rats them out.
Me: “Why the heck is there small rodents in my drink?” Waiter: “You asked for some mice!”
What do you call an inquisitive Hispanic rodent? Por queen pine.
What do you call a rodent that fetches sticks? A lab rat!
If you want to replace pet rodents, which state should you go to? New Hamster.
What did the rodent say to the vegan conifer? I’d rather eat pork, you one!
Ii have this pet rodent with extremely large feet. I call him Ratatouille.
I taught my pet rodent to chew holes in car tires. Hi is now my little “deflator Mouse”.
What did Elvis say when he divorced the rodent? You ain’t nothing but a groundhog.
Where do rodents go to pet high? Hamsterdam.
What rifle is used to kill rodents”? A Mauser.
What do you call a satanic rodent? A sinchilla.
Where did prohibition-era rodents get their alcohol? The Squeakeasy.
What do yo uget when you cross laundry detergent with a rat? Bubble and Squeak!
Why do rats need oiling? Because they squeak!
What is a rat’s favorite breakfast cereal? Mice Krispies.
What was the name of the rat Roman emperor? Julius Cheeser!
How do you get a rat to smile? Say cheese!
What do you call two rats love? Squeakhearts.
What is a rat’s favorite movie? The Fast and the Furriest!
What did the old rat need when he went ot the dentist? Ro-dentures.
What’s a rat’s favorite dessert? Cheesecake.
Why does a rat do the washing up? To make it squeaky clean.
Who is the star of rodent Harry Potter? Daniel Rat-cliffe.
What sound does it make when you knock on a rats door? Rat-a-tat-tat! A very social animal, there are many different species of rat.
What’s the name of the famous rat philosopher? Soc-rat-es.
How do rats keep fit? By practicing ka-rat-e!
What did the rodent say when he got the wrong answer on his test? Drat!
What do you call rats who are brothers? Bro-dents.
Why did the rat go to university? Because he wanted to join an f-rat-ernity.
What did the Mummy rat say to the little rat when he passed his test? Cong-rats!
Did you hear about the rat who moved out of the city and settled in the country? He was tired of the rat race.
In India, rats are revered…but in Hungary they are Budapest!
Did you hear about the skateboarding rat? He was totally rat-ical, dude.
Did you know that rats have landed on the moon? Rat’s one small step for a rat, one giant leap for rat-kind.
What do you get if you drop boiling water down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies.
A rat-catcher was chasing a rat when he lost him. The snitch pointed to the sewer and said, “He went rat way!”
I play in a band called Arrogant Rat. We’re kind of like Modest Mouse, but way better.
Did you hear about the rodent who worked out 24/7? He was a real gym rat.
What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.
Do you know how rats fall for rat traps? I mean, it’s such a cheesy setup.
What did the little rat get arrested for? For Rat-keteering.
Have you heard about the rat that got a big job in politics? She is a bureauc-rat now.
Have you met the rat that doesn’t want to tell anyone his name? He prefers to stay anony-mouse.
What did the rat say wehn he saw a bat flying overhead? Oh my! An angel!
What airline did the rat use when he went on vacation? Emi-rat-es.
Why do some people use rat-shaped fishing bait? Because they want to catch a catfish.
What happened to the man who suddenly found a number of big rats in his home? He was pretty rattled after it.
What did everyone call the gnawing rats who were very blunt? They were no-nonsense rats.
What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs Bunny.
Why was the energizer bunny arrested? He was charged with battery!
What is the one vehicle a rat likes to drive around in? The Ford Moustang.
How can you get a rat to smile? You tell it some cheesy jokes.
What would you call twin rats who feature in a movie about cooking? Rata-two-ee.
Did you see that big dead rat on the road? I think that was a roadent.
It’s guinea be a good week!
Why did the rat say “woof”? Because it wasn’t a rat. It was a chihuahua.
Why can’t rodents be successful criminals? Because someone alway rats them out.
What do you get when you mix a rat and an elephant? What cares? It’s a relephant.
What did the man say when he accidentally dropped something into the sewer? Rats!
What would C.S. Lewis write if he was a cute rat? The Chronicles of Gnaw-rnia.
How do you get a mouse to smile? Say “cheese”.
The rodent club finished drafting a constitution, but it has yet to be ratified.
How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but it’s cramped.
What do rodents do after dinner? Gopher a walk.
Helping small rodents makes me thirsty for lemming aid.
Poor hamsters run in circles, but posh rodents enjoy the ferrets wheel.
I dreamed I was a rodent. It was a little mouse unusual dream.
I bought a driverless car, but it drove itself off a cliff. What a lemming.
Rat got your tongue?
If something drives you batty, relax, take a deep breath, and just say “I don’t give a flying fox”.
I try to speak the language of hamsters. But the translation gets all gerbiled.
The Big Blue Mouse.
Compared to a pig, falling in love with a rodent is nothing. Especially when it’s the pork you pine.
Ah, rats!
What did the boyfriend mouse say to his girlfriend’s mouse family? Mice to meet you.
I invented a sandwich made with rodent meat. I call it the Mickey Mouse Club. Comes with chips.
Not in my mouse!

Two bunnies with daisies in their mouths outside.

How To Write Your Own Pun

Trying To Write Your Own Puns?

[cboxarea id="cbox-IVEtmKHDExiTjpDi"]

The first thing you need to do is say a rodent word like rat, mouse, or rabbit over and over a few times. Then, listen and try to think of other words they sound like.

Now, you can write a pun like, “These rat puns are under-rat-ed!”

This is your last time to write amazing rat puns!