193 Best Basketball Puns And Jokes To Help You Score

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Looking for the best basketball puns and jokes? This list has 193 that I know you’ll love. You’ll be hooping for joy!

Basketball is a sport that brings joy and laughter to fans worldwide.

I’ve written this huge collection of basketball puns and jokes for a slam dunk of humor. Whether you’re a die-hard basketball fan or simply looking for a good laugh, these puns are sure to score big!

Note: This post may contain affiliate links, which means if you buy from my link I might make a small commission. This does not affect the price you pay. See the full affiliate disclosure here.

Get ready to dribble with laughter! I know you’re going to love them.

A basketball player is doing a backwards slam dunk.

Basketball Puns

I hope you love this hoop-tactic collection of hilarious basketball puns!

  1. I felt it in my score.
  2. Ball aboard.
  3. I swish you were here.
  4. I dunk understand.
  5. It’s a piece of dunk.
  6. Batten down the bracket.
  7. I hoop you understand.
  8. Do you have a death swish?
  9. Get the hoop.
  10. I hoop to see you again.
  11. They have a verball agreement.
  12. I hoop your happy.
  13. Saved by the ball.
  14. I hoop your day is a slam dunk!
  15. When you swish upon a star.
  16. Color me hoopy.
  17. Leave nething to the imagination.
  18. We’ve screen this before.
  19. I dream is a swish your heart makes.
  20. That’s pointless.
  21. What’s all the bracket?
  22. Don’t lose hoop.
  23. Push the shopping court please.
  24. I can’t rim-ember.
  25. Your swish is my command.
  26. Not for nething.
  27. It’s a pain in the pass.
  28. Chest pass the ball.
  29. It’s a last hoop.
  30. A night to rimember.
  31. You swish.
  32. Hoopy wife, hoopy life.
  33. It’s just a pile of horse shot.
  34. Keep hoop alive.
  35. Don’t be a brick about it.
  36. Just swish places.
  37. Hoopy as a clam.
  38. Ball I want is you.
  39. As far as I can rimember.
  40. There’s nething to it.
  41. Hoopy pills.
  42. Hoop for the best.
  43. We need a rimidy.
  44. I rimember like it was yesterday.
  45. I hope you’re hoopy.
  46. As you swish.
  47. Nething ventured, nething gained.
  48. Hoop springs eternal.
  49. Don’t be a brick.
  50. I wouldn’t swish that on anyone.
  51. Hoopy trails.
  52. I felt it in my score.
  53. Don’t worry, be hoopy.
  54. Shoot!
  55. A hoopy medium.
  56. Merry Christmas and Hoopy New Year.
  57. A don’t rimember.
  58. Death swish.
  59. Swish something really hard.
  60. We’re saved by the ball.
  61. Ball of duty.
  62. Good for nething.
  63. It’s a pain in the pass.
  64. Don’t you swish!
  65. Foul play.
  66. Hoop against hoop.
  67. A swish list.
  68. It’s nething to write home about.
  69. Hoop there it is!
  70. Of courts!
  71. Rimember the Alamo.
  72. Be careful what you swish for.
  73. Thanks for the opportunety.
  74. Double or nething.
  75. Swishful thinking.
  76. Oh shot!
  77. Trigger hoopy.
  78. You’re swish is granted.
  79. It’s ball or nothing.
  80. Hoopy as a lark.
  81. Hoop do you think you are?
  82. I don’t rimember.
  83. Just swish places.
  84. Better than nething.
  85. Rimember me.
A closeup black and white photo of a basketball net.

Basketball Jokes

Here’s the best list of funny basketball jokes. They’re a slam-dunk with laughter!

  1. What do the Detroit Pistons and New York Knicks have in common? Athlete’s foot.
  2. Why did the basketball team go to the bakery? To get their daily bread and roll.
  3. What do you call a basketball player who can’t find his shoes? Lost soles.
  4. Why did the basketball player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the competition was up.
  5. What do you call a basketball player who can’t pass? A ball hog.
  6. Why did the basketball player bring a fan to the game? To keep cool under all that pressure.
  7. What do you call a basketball player who can’t make a layup? A basket case.
  8. Why did the basketball player bring a pencil to the game? To draw fouls.
  9. What’s a sad basketball player? A bawler.
  10. Why did the basketball player bring a broom to the game? To sweep the competition.
  11. What do you call a basketball player who loves to cook? A dunking chef.
  12. Why did the basketball player bring a camera to the game? To shoot some action shots.
  13. What does a doctor give tall basketball players? A jump shot.
  14. Why did the basketball player bring a dictionary to the game? To improve their word play.
  15. What do you call a basketball player who misses all their shots? A net negative.
  16. Why did the basketball court go to therapy? It had too many hoops and dribbles.
  17. Why did the professional basketball team go to the bakery? They needed a good roll model.
  18. What do you call a basketball player who can’t stop sneezing? Air ball.
  19. Why did the famous basketball player bring a pencil to the game? In case they needed to draw fouls!
  20. What do you call a basketball player who can’t jump? Lowry on hops.
  21. What do you call a basketball player who loves to garden? A hooper-culturist.
  22. Why did the bad basketball player bring a raincoat to the game? In case they made it rain three-pointers.
  23. Why did the basketball player bring a suitcase to the game? Because they wanted to travel!
  24. Why did the basketball player bring a map to the game? So they wouldn’t get lost in the paint.
  25. What do you call a basketball player who can’t make a free throw? A foul shooter.
  26. Why did the basketball player bring a broom to the game? To sweep the competition.
  27. What do you call a basketball player who loves to cook? A dunking chef.
  28. Why did the basketball player bring a pillow to the game? In case they needed to rest on defense!
  29. What do you call a basketball player who can’t stop talking? A jabberwocky.
  30. Why did the basketball player bring a camera to the game? To shoot some action shots!
  31. What do you call a basketball player who loves to dance? A hooperstar.
  32. Why did the basketball player bring a dictionary to the game? To improve their word play.
  33. What do you call a basketball player who can’t make a layup? A misster.
  34. Why did the basketball team go to the bank? To get their bounce checks!
  35. What do basketball players do when they lose their keys? They check their dribble.
  36. Why was the basketball team always in trouble? Because they kept fouling out!
  37. Why did the basketball player bring a ladder to the game? Because he wanted to take his shots to the next level.
  38. What do you call a basketball player who gets a sunburn? A basketball hoop.
  39. Why don’t basketball players go on vacation? Because they would get called for traveling.
  40. How do basketball players stay cool in the summer? They use their fans.
  41. Why was the basketball court always wet? Because the players kept dribbling.
  42. What do you call a stinky point guard? A foul shot.
  43. What did the basketball say to the player? You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
  44. Why did the scarecrow become a basketball player? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  45. Why did the basketball team go to the bank for a loan? They needed to improve their net worth.
  46. What do you call a basketball player who can’t stop sneezing? A sneeze guard.
  47. Why did the basketball player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the tickets were in the upper deck.
  48. What did the basketball player say when he lost his job? I got a lot of rebounds, but I couldn’t make any assists.
  49. Why did the basketball team go to the bakery? Because they needed a good roll model!
  50. What did the basketball coach say to the player who forgot his jersey? You can’t play without a shirt.
  51. Why did the basketball player bring string to the March Madness game? Because he wanted to tie up the score.
  52. How do basketball players stay cool during a game? They stand near the fans.
  53. What did one basketball say to the other basketball? I’ll never let you down, I’ll always bounce back.
  54. What’s a basketball player’s favorite type of music? Hip-Hoop!
  55. Why do basketball players make terrible spies? Because they always dribble.
  56. What do you call a basketball player who gets in trouble with the law? A baller in a cell.
  57. How do basketball players stay warm in the winter? They use jump shots!
  58. Why was the basketball game a good book? Because it had a lot of hoopla.
  59. What’s a basketball player’s favorite type of movie? Anything with slam dunks.
  60. Why did the basketball player go to the doctor? Because he had too many swish cheese sandwiches!
  61. What do basketball players do when they get cold? They stand near the heater.
  62. What’s a basketball player’s favorite place in New York City? Madison Square Garden.
  63. How do basketball players send mail? They shoot it through the hoop.
  64. Why did the basketball player bring a pencil to the game? In case he needed to draw a foul.
  65. What do you call a basketball player who argues with the referee? A ballistic player.
  66. Why did the basketball player bring a backpack to the game? Because he wanted to shoot some backpack shots.
  67. Why did the basketball team go to the art museum? Because they wanted to improve their brush shots.
  68. What do you call a basketball player who can’t stop dancing? A ballerina.
  69. How do basketball players stay calm under pressure? They keep their cool by shooting free throws.
  70. Why did the basketball player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the championship was up for grabs.
  71. What’s a basketball player’s favorite type of cereal? Rebound Crunch.
  72. How do basketball players stay focused during a game? They use their court vision!
  73. Why did the basketball player bring a towel to the game? Because he wanted to wipe up the competition.
  74. What’s a basketball player’s favorite type of footwear? High-tops, of course!
  75. Why did the basketball coach go to the bank? To get his team some quarters.
  76. What did the basketball say to the hoop? You’re a real slam-dunk friend.
  77. Why did the basketball team go to the bakery before the game? They needed some turnovers.
  78. How do basketball players stay cool in the summer? They find some shade-ups.
  79. What do you call a basketball player who can carry a tune? A ball-a-cappella singer.
  80. Why did the basketball player bring a pencil to the game? So he could draw fouls.
  81. What’s a basketball player’s favorite restaurant? Dunkin’ donuts.
  82. Why was the basketball team always so calm? Because they knew how to keep their composure under pressure.
  83. How do basketball players stay in shape during the offseason? They court fitness.
  84. Why was the basketball player a great musician? Because he had excellent hand-ear coordination.
  85. What do you call a basketball player who can’t stop talking? A ball chatter.
  86. Why did the basketball player go to the barber? He wanted to get a good cut.
  87. What’s a basketball player’s favorite type of seafood? Slammin’ shrimp.
  88. How do basketball players make phone calls? They shoot a text.
  89. What did the basketball coach say to the computer? Quit hacking into our plays
  90. Why did the basketball team go to the amusement park? To ride the slam coaster.
  91. What do you call a basketball player with an attitude? A ball-titude.
  92. Why did the pro basketball player bring a ladder to the game? Because he wanted to go above and beyond!
  93. What did the basketball say to the hoop? Catch you on the rebound.
  94. Why don’t basketball players go on vacation during the season? Because they can’t find the time to travel.
  95. What do you call a basketball player who loves to bake? A doughnut shooter.
  96. Why was the basketball team so good at math? Because they knew how to count the points.
  97. Why did the losing basketball team go to the beach? To work on their jump shots in sandy conditions.
  98. What do you call a basketball player who loves to garden? A slam dunk squash player!
  99. Why did the basketball player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the competition was sky-high!
  100. What did the best players say to the referee after a bad call? You’re a foul guy!
  101. What’s a basketball player’s favorite type of car? A slam convertible!
  102. How do basketball players stay in shape? They hoop it up at the gym!
  103. What do basketball players eat before the NBA finals? Slam-on sandwiches!
  104. Why don’t good basketball players ever get lost? Because they always follow the court.
  105. What’s a basketball player’s favorite type of music? Jump and blues.
  106. What candy bar do they sell in the basketball arena? Fast Breaks.
  107. Why did the basketball player bring a ladder to the ball game? Because he wanted to reach new heights.
  108. What did one basketball say to the other before the game? Let’s bounce.
  109. Why did the best basketball player bring a ladder to the game? Because he wanted to shoot some hoops.
  110. What did Kobe Bryant and Michael Jordan both have? Mad hops.
  111. Why did the NCAA basketball player bring a fishing rod to the game? Because he wanted to catch some buckets.
  112. What story did the basketball player tell? A tall tale.
  113. What did the team’s star basketball player say when he missed a layup? Alley whoops!
  114. Why did the basketball players get technicals? Because they have foul mouths.

These puns are all in good fun. I hope these basketball puns continue to be a slam dunk!

Someone is shooting hoops at sunset.  The ball is about to go through the hoop.

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Final Thoughts

Did you find a good basketball joke? Or some funny basketball puns?

I hope you like these puns and jokes as much as I do! Let me know what you think in the comments.

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