100 Best Bone Puns And Jokes That Are Very Humerus!

Looking for the best bone puns and jokes? You’ve come to the right place! This list of 100 puns are so funny, you’ll laugh your skull off.

I love puns! I think they’re so witty and fun.

I love saying them in conversation to make people laugh.

Note: This post may contain affiliate links, which means if you buy from my link I might make a small commission. This does not affect the price you pay. See the full affiliate disclosure here.

These puns are perfect to say while watching scary movies ease the mood. Say them at the doctor’s office while getting a broken bone fixed.

They’re just so fun if you like to laugh. If you have a family member or friend that’s an orthopedic surgeon, these would be perfect to use!

You really just can’t go wrong saying these puns whenever you’d like.

[cboxarea id="cbox-IVEtmKHDExiTjpDi"]

I have also written posts about skeleton puns, skull puns, ghost puns, witch puns, and puns about death. I know you’ll love those too!

This is a photo of an x-ray of an adult hand.

Table of Contents

Bone Puns

These are my favorite puns about bones!

Halloween greetings from your favorite bonehead.
I didn’t know what to wear this Halloween until I had a true epipha-knee.
You can definitely say I’m a natural bone leader.
That’s as dry as a bone.
You give me femur, femur when you kiss me, femur when you hold me tight.
No guts, no glory!
Tibia honest, these skull puns are hilarious!
With this one, I always know everything is going tibia okay.
The bonely one for me!
When cabin fever becomes cabin femur.
Tibia, or not tibia? That is the question.
I’ve been working my fingers to the bone to make this the best Halloween ever.
You’re looking at a couple of phalang-eniuses.
Spending time home a-bone this year.
I have a bone to pick with you.
I chose this costume because I want to be hip.
I’ve always been a fan of humerus costumes.
I’m a bone-afide Halloween professional.
A star is bone.
This year, I kind of had to a-bone-don all my plans.
Ain’t nobody gonna rib us apart.
It’s going to be a great Halloween! I can feel it in my bones.
Listen buddy, I wasn’t bone yesterday.
It’s never bonely with this one.
No body gets my Halloween costume this year…
Having this one in my life is always such a bone-us.
You big ol’ bag a bones.
Bone to be wild.
We’re having a real Halloween Bone-anza this year.
No need to tell me because I already know, I look totally fibula-s!
We marrowly escaped that one!
Thought about dressing up as a lumberjack, but came as a lumbar-jack instead.
I was bone for this!
I bonely have eyes for you!

This is a photo of a doctor holding a tablet that's showing an x-ray of a foot.

Bone Jokes

I hope you love these humerus bone jokes!

Ribcages are terrible liars. You can see right through them.
You can always tell when a spine finds your bone puns funny. They start cracking up.
The bone was making me annoyed. He kept telling lies. If you ask me, he was a total phoney-ba-boney.
The ribcage really wanted to start a fight on Halloween. He had a bone to pick with the werewolf.
Bone lovers always tend to like spending time in the forest. I found out that it’s because they like the s-pine trees.
Did you hear about the bone that was almost eaten by a group of wild dogs? It was a marrow escape.
I use to have loads of funny spine puns, but now my supply is bone dry. I obviously wasn’t as femurous as I thought I was.
Who is the most famous skeleton detective? Sherlock Bones.
What do bony people use to get into their homes? A skeleton key.
I went to a school for learning about bones for a while. I’m sad I graduated, I really liked going to osteoclass.
I asked my butcher to give me some t-bones, but instead he gave me sirloins. It was only when I got home that I realized he’d made a misteak.
The rib cage would always order a wine that was full bodies in the restaurant, I didn’t want to say anything but I’m pretty sure it was because it didn’t have one.
I met a French orthopedic doctor. I didn’t know how to greet him, but he said “bone-jour”.
Bones are always so calm. Nothing ever gets under their skin.
Why didn’t the skeleton play football? His heart wasn’t in it.
How do skeletons send their mail? Through the bony express.
Every Sunday, the ribcage likes to play his organ for the congregation.
If your friends don’t laugh at these hilarious bone puns, their funny bone is probably broke.
I was worried that my bone humor would fall flat, but then I used my funny bone.
No one knees to know this, but I really kneed you.
What is a skeleton’s favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
I had to send my spine to prison. It was bad to the bone.
Backbones are great at chopping down trees. They make brilliant lumbar-jacks.
My best friend told me he had my back. I’d been wondering where that went.
I left a skull out in the sun. It became bone dry.
What did the old skeletons yell as they left on a cruise? Bone voyage!
I want to tell some more funny bone jokes, but I just don’t have the guts to.
Tibia honest, it takes a lot of spine to memorize jokes and puns about the bones in the skeleton.
Sorry, I just got a text on my cell bone, I’ll be right back.
Do you know how many bones there are in a human hand? I’m not sure either, but I’m assuming it’s a handful.
I went to the doctor to donate my body to science. He told me I had to spine on the dotted line.
I went to dinner last week with a group of orthopedic surgeons. Before we ate, they insisted that we say, “Bone appetit!”
If you try to call an orthopedic doctor on her rotary skelephone, she isn’t going to answer. It’s best to get her on her cell bone.
What do you call a skeleton who rings the doorbell? A dead ringer.
The orthopedic doctor was working far too hard. I told him, “You’re going to work yourself down to the bone!”
I went to an orthopedic surgeon’s house for tea. She served it in bone china.
The osteopathic doctor was always a favorite guest at a potluck dinner. It was because he brought the best spare ribs.
What’s a skeleton’s favorite plant? A bone-zai tree.
If you want to get a hold of your anatomy professor, the best thing to do is call them on their cell bone.
There are two biology teachers at my school that are passionate about teaching about bones. One is humerus, but the other is extremely sternum.
The most famous skeleton I know is Sherlock Bones.
Lots of bones try to be cool, but none are ever going to be more trendy than the hip.
I knew what was about to happen next when I turned into a skeleton. I could feel it in my bones.
Just hold tight, this is going tibia okay.
I had a guitar pick made of bone and I lost it somewhere in my bedroom. I really have a bone to pick with myself for being so careless.
My friend was shot clean through his skull but survived. I can’t imagine what was going through his mind at the time.
How much do human bones weigh? A skele-ton.
Keep scrolling please. I’d tell you a joke about bones, but it probably won’t be humerus.
Leg bones are known for always wanting to tell the truth. They find it easy tibia honest.
Ribcages often get sick when it’s fall, because of all the windy days. The chill goes right through them.
Getting hurt is such a bone-breaking experience, but you can’t deny it’s a spine-tickling event.
I love my funny bone. There is no denying that I find it very humerus.
What is a skeleton’s favorite type of film to watch? A spine-tingler.
Try as she might, the skeleton just couldn’t manage to drag herself out of bed. She was bone tired.
My bones don’t follow normal rules. They’re bone tibia wild.
A dog’s favorite book is Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Bone.
I went to an anatomy beauty contest. It was kind of boring, in the end no body won.
Why was the young skeleton in trouble? Because he told a little fib-ula.
I picked up a pile of bones I ordered online. I was surprised that they weight a skele-ton.
Two thigh bones couldn’t be bothered to go out, so they just stayed in bed. Lazy bones.
I put a skull on the front of my Harley Davidson motorbike. What can I say, I’m bone to be wild.
If you decide to boil your funny bone, you might be able to turn it into a laughing stock.
I ulna want to be with you.
The femur tried to propose to the radius, he asked “Will you marrow me?”
A group of archeologists found a leg bone once when they were doing an excavation. They were so excited about what they found that they invited all the other archeologists they knew over to help them remove it. It turned out to be quite the shin-dig.
I always knew I would end up being an orthopedic doctor. When I was a child I just felt it in my bones.